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16 things that would happen if Gilmore Girls was set in Dublin

Where you lead, I will folley…

First published January 2016


1. Mary Black would sing A Woman’s Heart as the theme song


2. Stoneybatter would take the place of Stars Hollow and members of Delorentos and Villagers would show up on random street corners singing songs


3. Lorelai would find out she was pregnant in the toilets of the Kylemore Cafe, using a pregnancy test bought in Sam McCauleys


4. Her friends would slag her about Spanish sailors and write ‘A1 Sharon’ on her copy of Soundings


5. Calling her baby girl ‘Rory’ for short would cause untold confusion for Rory’s entire life


6. Luke would manage an Eddie Rockets and regularly hop teenagers out of it for taking the piss and sharing one Oreo milkshake


7. Lorelai and Rory would inexplicably live in a huge fancy house on the nice bit of the North Circular Road, despite having no money


8. Rory’s Foxrock Granny would send her to Alexandra College, where she’d found a school newspaper and write an exposé on the scandal behind the ever rising price of Freddo Bars in the tuck shop


9. Rory would really want to go to UCD but her grandparents would be sneaking into her room to change her CAO first preference to Trinners


10. Domhnall Gleeson would play Rory’s first boyfriend, work in Super Valu, and wear bootcut jeans


11. Colin Farrell would play Rory’s rebellious second boyfriend, slip the fact that he’s from the ‘Knock into every second sentence, and never fail at buying naggins underage from the offie


12. Lane would sneak off to Electric Picnic for the weekend, after telling her mam she was going on a training course to be a Eucharistic minister at mass


13. Town Hall meetings would revolve around bin collections, fighting over who should lead the Tidy Towns committee, and when the 24 hour Irish dancing marathon should take place


14. Suki’s greatest enemy would be Rachel Allen, and she would hiss at the telly everytime Allen was on talking about ‘buttah’


15. Lorelai would mortify Rory by showing up to her debs with one of the teachers, and be caught shifting him in the jacks


16. Rory would end up going to Trinners, get schols, and fall for the heir to the Indo


It’s official: Gilmore Girls is coming back on Netflix

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