Dublin: 6 °C Saturday 23 September, 2023
# shift me mate
22 thoughts every girl has while trying to get the shift
“Have I shaved my legs?”

GIRLS. THEY’RE MYSTERIOUS, sophisticated creatures, aren’t they? It’s so hard to know what they’re thinking over there, on the other side of the dance floor, surrounded by a gaggle of mates.

Here’s a glimpse into what might be going through a girl’s mind when she’s out to get the shift.

(Don’t worry, the boys will be getting their turn too.)

1. Right, we’re at da klurb. Time to do a lap and see who else is here.

anigif_enhanced-2988-1409834615-22 Giphy Giphy

2. Jesus, it’s very warm. Am I sweating? Can everyone see that I’m sweating? Oh god.

anigif_enhanced-23418-1402682459-23 Buzzfeed Buzzfeed

3. Did I shave my legs? Just in case, like.

caWvqMS Reddit Reddit

4. Is that hot guy* looking at me, or my friend?

*Artistic license has been taken with this depiction of a Hot Guy

5. *fluffs hair* It’s me!

giphy Giphy Giphy

6. Ah, he was actually looking over my shoulder. Never mind.

ann-perkins-straw Zap2it Zap2it

7. *dances self-consciously* Where are all the rides?

nightclub2 Flickr / whiskeytango Flickr / whiskeytango / whiskeytango

8. Who just touched my bum? I swear to god…

leslie_knope_angry Poobou Poobou

9. I certainly do not ‘have a smoke’. I’m only in the smoking area to scope out the lads, don’t you know.

10. OH HAYYYY - he’s decent-looking. Might ask him for a smoke, or a light for someone else.

Anything but actually telling him that he’s cute. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

giphy Giphy Giphy

11. And he’s going in for the kill!

12. Easy on the tongue there, cheers.

tongue Shutterstock Shutterstock

13. My friends better stop roaring at me from across the smoking area. I HEAR YOU GIRLS, YOU’RE GAS.

tumblr_lxr29be92W1rn95k2o1_500 Netdna-cdn Netdna-cdn

14. Oh, the girls are gone now. WHERE DID THE GIRLS GO?

tumblr_ly2nldy0mX1qhbe82 Tumblr Tumblr

15. The lights just came on. Everything has changed, changed utterly. I must leave him.

giphy Giphy Giphy

16. Yes, this is my totally valid and working number that you can of course contact me on…

roflbot (16) Engadget Engadget

17. Please don’t call to see if I gave you the right number. PLEASE don’t call to see if I gave you the right number.

tumblr_lpyvxmhCHX1qbz0sko1_400 Tumblr Tumblr

18. SEE YE.

large Whicdn Whicdn

19. Now, where are my friends…

alone-in-a-crowd Wordpress Wordpress

20. I have lipstick all over my face, don’t I.

Lipstick-Face-copy Phawker Phawker

21. Ah, yes. Yes I do. Mortified.

anigif_enhanced-buzz-19669-1422465192-15 Buzzfeed Buzzfeed

22. Oh well. Who’s for a curry cheese chip?

Curry-Cheese-Chips Supermacs Supermacs

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