IN IRELAND, WE save the actual romance for when you’re already going out a few months. Until then, we have all of these.
1. Eddie Rockets
Look, Eddie Rockets is fine. But it has all the atmosphere of a rural petrol station.
2. The cinema, with approximately 1434556 of your friends
You were ostensibly there to ‘meet’ someone, but really you and your date stood in your respective groups and ignored each other until the time came to kiss. Romantic.
3. The cinema, with just your date
A distinctly different kind of event. Without a gang of mates to act as a comfort blanket, what’s it going to be like? Awkward, that’s what.
4. The ‘amusements’
As a teenager, it meant watching other people play pool.
As an adult, it means getting far too competitive at the air hockey machine.
5. A trendy new restaurant with communal tables and very loud music
Neither party can hear what the other one is saying across the table, and the people wedged in beside you get the full blast of that first date awkwardness.
“DO YOU LIKE YOUR JOB?” “WHAAAAT?”
6. A random patch of waste ground/shitey park
Shifting against a wall or a tree somewhere cold and muddy is a rite of passage for Irish teenager. Anything to get away from your parents, right?
7. A shopping centre
Do we have anything in particular to buy? No. Do we have anywhere in particular to go? No. *shrugs* Shopping centre it is!
8. A ‘spin’ down the town
It seemed terribly exotic at the time, didn’t it.
9. For ‘coffee’, after meeting on a night out
You met when you were both tipsy. Now, in the sober light of day, everything is different. Much, much different.
10. The ‘I’ll see you out, then?’ date
When you’re both going out with separate groups of friends, but arrange to meet up at the same pub later on in the night.
The spiritual successor to going to the cinema with a gang of mates.
Got any grim date experiences you think we missed? Leave ‘em in the comments.