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The Guide To Acting Like A Local In Dublin

The Park, the hops, the buskers and the craic.

COMING UP TO Dublin soon and want to fit right in?

Or are you a Dub to the bone and want to make sure you’re flying your flag proud? Well, then you need our guide to acting like a local in the capital. Yeow!

(PS – don’t worry, those beyond The Pale. Serenity now. We’ll be showing everyone how to act like a local around the rest of the country in due course.)

1. Don’t be caught dead in Temple Bar

Nope. This is a Dub-free zone for carousing. You’re more likely to find Dubliners down on Harcourt or Camden Street. Or in Abra.

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2. Avoid walking down Grafton Street if you’re in a rush

The buskers. Oh dear God, the buskers. If you’re in a hurry and need to get across the city fast, then pedestrianised Grafton Street is not where you wanna be. Far too many people walking slowly, stopping suddenly, and the wretched groans of someone torturing Careless Whisper on a tuba.

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3. Mulligans is the place for a pint – not the Storehouse

Or the Gravediggers, or the Long Hall, or Grogans. A Dubliner wouldn’t go to the Storehouse for a casual pint, put it that way.

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4. If a restaurant describes itself as “traditionally Irish”…

It definitely isn’t. Avoid the boxty and stew like a plague – and if a restaurant tries to hustle you in from the street brandishing a menu, run in the opposite direction.

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5. If you’re bored, watch some planes take off

If you think this sounds more boring, then you’re not a true Dub. Ah sure get a few sandwiches and roll out to the lay-by near the Airport. Grand.

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6. Do NOT get a tuk tuk

They are not an acceptable way to beat the traffic.

You’ll find a real Dub driving a horse and cart, but not paying to be in the back of one. And the new tuk tuks that have sprung up in the city centre aren’t exactly a common form of transport for locals.

Well, not unless they’ve over-imbibed at Mulligans. (See above.)

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7. Complain about Dublin Bus

If you’re new in town, you might not feel comfortable getting into full swing and having a good old moan. But that’s one thing that Dublin locals love to do – especially about the city’s amenities. So feel free to give out yards about Dublin Bus and the likes. In an affectionate way, of course.

8. Use the Park

The Zoo, the ponds, the cricket pitches, the sports grounds, the Pope’s Cross, the interpretive centre, the People’s Playground, the Aras, the Embassy, the Ordnance Survey, the deer…

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But NOT THIS.

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9. Claim to prefer Aslan to U2

All together now: “HOW CAN I PROTECT YOU IN THIS… CRAAAZY WORLD?”

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10. Don’t phone for a taxi

There’s an ocean of them right on your doorstep. You’ll be fighting them off with a manky stick.

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11. Don’t say “I’ll burst ya”

Do say: “Get out of that garden”.

The O'Byrne Files / eircome.net The O'Byrne Files / eircome.net / eircome.net

12. See the sea

A real Dub – either adopted or born – knows the value of living in a city beside the sea. You can’t beat it. North or south of the city, Dublin’s coastline is something every local should try to see as often as possible.

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j0sh (www.pixael.com) j0sh (www.pixael.com)

Are you a local in the capital? Then let us know your tips for fitting in down below. And keep it clean – there’s civic pride at stake here.

Read: 21 unmistakeable signs you’re a Northside Dubliner at heart>

Read: 18 things every Dubliner knows for sure>

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