IN A SINGLE day, Kim Kardashian managed to make €12.5 million from selling makeup products from her new line. That’s a lot of money. Here are some ways that a regular person could make that much money and how long it would take.
1. Win the draw for €10,000 on The Late Late Show 1250 times
Considering the fact that The Late Late Show is only on television for approximately 40 weeks per year, you would need to win the prize on every week’s episode for 31 years to catch up with Kim Kardashian.
2. Work 135,1351 hours at a minimum wage job
That amounts to about 34,650 weeks of work which is equal to 666 years (without holidays). Now entering The Late Late Show competition every week doesn’t sound too bad.
3. Cut back on avocados
It’s very easy for millennials to get ahead of themselves when it comes to buying avocados. To make €12.5 million, all you’ve got to do is resist the temptation to buy 18,115,942 avocados for 69c each in Tesco. Simple.
4. Or maybe stop buying lattes
If you can’t bear to part with avocados, maybe it’s time to consider lowering your caffeine intake dramatically. If you cut 4,166,666 cups of coffee out of your diet, you will have €12.5 million in no time.
5. Work as a TD for 138 years
The minimum a TD earns in Ireland is €89,950 per year. That’s not including the nice bonuses that they get at Christmas and all of the other expenses that they can claim throughout the year.
Unlike the minimum wage figure provided about, this one has plenty of holidays included. There are three months every summer. Over the 138 years you need to serve as a TD to raise your €12.5 million, 34.5 of those years will be holidays. On top of that, you don’t even have to go to work every day for this one. Just swan into the Dáil whenever the humour hits you.
6. Become a Dublin landlord
If you can acquire a property with two bedrooms, regardless of its condition, there’s a good chance you can charge €2,000 per month. Now you would need to collect rent from tenants for 520 years but the good thing is you can also combine this one with being a TD to speed up the process. Then you can get multiple properties and you’ll be catching up with Kim Kardashian in no time.
7. Try the lottery
The odds of winning a decent amount in the lottery are probably stronger than banking on Ryan Tubridy to give you the prize every single week for the rest of his career on The Late Late Show. It’ll cost way too much credit too. Aim for the Euromillions because several Irish people have won that, but zero Irish people have won the draw on The Late Late Show every consecutive week for 31 years.
8. Sell Bitcoins
If you happen to have invested in 5,689 Bitcoins earlier this decade (which would have cost you $27 in 2010), you could be sitting on €12,500,000. Each one of your Bitcoins is now worth €2,197. Last month a Bitcoin was worth €3,000. Sell them ASAP if you want to catch up with Kim.
9. Open a brunch restaurant
This is fairly rare, but if you’ve got a very well decorated brunch restaurant, you can comfortably charge €12.50 for an avocado on toast. You can buy 6 eggs for €2 which means that each egg costs 30c. Make two poached eggs, put them on a bit of toast and you can charge about €14 for that when it cost little more than 75c to make.
Not sure of the maths on this one, but it feels like you could probably make Kim Kardashian money in a month or two of doing this.
10. Take a bank loan out
Remember in 2013 when the tape recordings from Anglo Irish Bank were released and John Bowe said that he needed a loan of €7 billion. When asked where he came up with the figure of €7 billion, he replied that he “picked it out of his arse”.
Go to your nearest credit union and give this a go. Kim Kardashian has made a lot of money off of her own arse but even she would be impressed with that figure.
Be brazen. Tell your bank that Donald Trump got where he is today by asking for a ‘small loan’ of a million dollars. He has declared bankruptcy six times and has accrued at least $1.8 billion dollars of debt over the course of his career. Maybe the trick all along is to be born rich. Who knows.
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