NIGHTS OUT AND white lies go together.
1. All sense of financial responsibility
Spending money doesn’t count when its in the pub. You’ll pay a tenner for two pints but think CDs are far too expensive.
2. How much of a rip taxis are
Fling that Hailo about like it’s your only hope.
https://vine.co/v/e7gvZvuuhbw
3. Time
Oh, I’ve missed all the nightlinks? Grand.
4. Just how stingy you really are
IT’S FINE, THIS ONE IS ON ME.
And that one. And that one.
Your round:
Their round:
5. Sense of nutrition
Calories don’t count on nights out.
6. Dancing shame
You forget you absolutely cannot and should not dance in any situation, yet there you are, first one on the dancefloor, giving it socks.
7. How much drink you can handle
You don’t even like shots! You’ll do two anyway.
GET THE SALT.
8. Staying put
Drinks + a club = wander central. You do the opening loop on a constant basis until you eventually disappear from everyone’s thoughts.
9. Personal space
“Sure randomer, come into this toilet cubicle with me”.
10. Sense of distance
No yous go ahead, I’m going to walk the ten miles home. It’s a nice night, sure.
11. Tiredness
Go to this gaff party at 3.30am? Grand.