Did you know that there exists a phobia known as Allegrophobia?
It’s characterised by an intense feeling of dread at the prospect of being late for any given event and a compulsion to plan to excess in order to ensure punctuality.
While not discussed as frequently as other phobias, a hape of us have it, to a greater or lesser extent.
And if you’re one of those people, the following will sound all too familiar.
1. You’d rather not show up at all than show up late…. even if it’s only by a few minutes.
The thought of having to apologise for being late makes you cringe because the act in itself goes again everything you stand for.
2. You over-estimate journey times by approximately 15 minutes… at the very least.
Even when it comes to places you have visited hundreds of times and know realitsically how long it takes to get there, you generally allow some extra time because, well, you’re you.
3. You feel your chest tightening and your stomach knotting when you realise you’re actually going to be late.
You know how irrational it is – people are late all the time and think nothing of it – but you just can’t pretend to be one of them.
4. You have tried – on many occasions – to slow your roll, get ready slower and leave the house later, and STILL you’re the first to arrive.
It has taken everything you’ve had to press pause on preparations or delay the whole process entirely, and yet it never, ever works. Being early or on-time is just part of your DNA.
5. You genuinely think a lack of punctuality equates with a lack of manners.
You rarely articulate this because you’d basically be telling everyone you know that they’re rude AF, but you think it 24/7.
6. You find it hugely irritating when you hear people laughing about their lack of time management.
It’s not funny. Why are people let away with this?
7. You feel the need to reiterate the time and venue of a meeting multiple times in the texts leading up to it in the hopes that the recipient will take them seriously.
You know they won’t because they’re the type of person who says ‘Better late than pregnant’, but you persist.
8. You’re the butt of your friends’ jokes who think it’s hilarious to suggest you’ll turn up for a Saturday brunch on the Wednesday before.
That’s just stupid.
9. You’ve never spent less than three hours in the airport prior to boarding.
You’re off on your holidays, why would you stress yourself by turning up late and ruining the whole pint in airport bar scenario.
10. The idea of missing a flight or train is literally alien to you.
Dublin Bus is out of your hands, however, but everyone knows that, sure.
11. You have a black mark against the name of anyone who has ever lied to you about being ‘on their way’.
And they know it.
12. You can’t help but send a passive-aggressive ‘Here now, but no rush!’ text when you arrive and realise – as usual – you are on your own.
You know people hate them, but whatever.
13. You loathe how little criticism is given to people who are constantly late which only further perpetuates the cycle.
Why is it just accepted? WHY?
14. During your most stressful journeys, you begin equating being on time with being late.
15. You have text people to tell them you’ll be late when actually what you mean is you’ll only be on time.
Yeah, we know, it’s madness.
16.You hate how eager you appear when you arrive early or on time, but it’s too late to change who you are.
And we all know how you feel about that.
