LOOK OUTSIDE. It’s cold and wet and windy, and you may be tempted to slip on some Ugg boots the next time you leave the house.
But stop! Don’t fall victim to their lies again. The reign of the Ugg boot as the National Winter Shoe of Ireland is long over, and for good reason.
Don’t let the seeming cosiness fool you…
Look at them. You’d think they’d be ideal for Ireland’s chilly winters, wouldn’t you?
…Uggs are essentially slippers
Go to the shoe section in Penneys. Then go to the slippers section. Can you tell the difference between an ‘ugg boot’ and a slipper? No, you can’t.
But due to some clever marketing, we’re walking around outside on what amounts to two pieces of cardboard.
And in their origin country of Australia, they’re treated as such
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Ugg boots were originally created to warm the feet of Australian surfers, and have never ever been fashionable there. The Aussies are pretty bemused about the whole thing, actually.
They are unquestionably not made for the Irish weather
Just try and navigate the average Irish street’s puddles, street juice and leaf-slush without getting a damp sock. You can’t.
And they will always, always scream early 2000s
Back in January, Vogue tried to tell us that Uggs were fashionable again. “Pair them with vintage dresses and chunky knits!” they cried. But really, Ugg boots were only ever paired with one thing:
That’s right – the quintessential 2000s velour trackie. And we’re NOT going back there again.
Your feet don’t need to go through this
Our arches are crying out just looking at this photo.
And we certainly don’t need any more of this
Croc Uggs. Wedge-heeled Uggs. Where will the madness end?
Even autocorrect doesn’t support them
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If that’s not a sign that it’s time to move on, we don’t know what is. RIP, Ugg boot. May your foamy soles never dampen our toes again.
