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Dublin: 5 °C Friday 29 March, 2024
the boob gap

14 enraging clothing problems every woman has had to endure

This is why we take so long to get ready.

WANT TO KNOW why some women spend so much time shopping? It’s not because they enjoy it. It’s because they have to deal with all of this.

1. Fake pockets

JGbiXoN Imgur Imgur

Are you… Are you joking? It is 2016 and we demand that everything that looks like a pocket IS AN ACTUAL POCKET.

2. Pockets that cannot accommodate the average modern phone

jeanspocket Instagram / maxysamy Instagram / maxysamy / maxysamy

For some reason, the makers of women’s jeans and trousers think that we only need fun-size pockets. This is not true. We need king-size pockets. Pockets down to our knees.

3. Fally-downy tights

We wouldn’t normally yank in public, but when it comes to fally-downy tights, all the rules go out the window. *yanks*

4. Putting on a top and heading out, then realising it’s see-through

This is why we have trust issues.

“Shite” – Kim Kardashian, probably.

5. Hearing a ‘rrrrrpp’ and knowing your jeans have finally succumbed to chub rub

Your jeans had what you thought was a tiny bit of wear on the inner thigh. You climbed the stairs a little too forcefully and…

6. The ‘boob gap’ on blouses and shirts

ZDjNtZ1 Imgur Imgur

If you are in any way, and we mean in any way endowed in the breastal area, and you want to wear a shirt – forget about it, or go up two sizes.

7. Outfits that assume you don’t need to wear underwear

asosunitard ASOS ASOS

Try to find a going out top or dress that doesn’t have a hole or a sheer panel in it. Just try.

8. Seeing a nice top/jumper, then realising it’s cropped

topshopcrop Topshop Topshop

We know it’s not The Style these days, but sometimes we want the few extra inches of fabric. Let us have it.

9. The tyranny of the strapless dress

giphy Giphy Giphy

Someone needs to write an instructional manual on the subtle hoick, because we certainly don’t know how to do it.

10. Having to fish around for the lining of your dress, which has somehow ended up around your waist

GET DOWN FROM THERE.

11. When your deodorant says ‘no marks’, but hark! Marks!

deodorant-mark Undershirtguy Undershirtguy

And they don’t go away quietly, let us tell you.

12. Wearing a jumpsuit, and having to get fully naked to wee

OK, so maybe this is our fault for buying them. But we look cute!

13. Snagging a nice jumper on your jewellery

snaggingjumper Flickr / goodywinks Flickr / goodywinks / goodywinks

*sharp inhale*

14. And finally, thinking you’ve managed to escape the dreaded panty line…

Visible Panty Line underneath black seamless leggings Wikimedia Wikimedia

Then catching sight of your arse in a mirror after you’ve left the house. SCREAM.

More: Irish women are crying out for dresses with sleeves in 2016>

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