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13 things in life you can always count on

It’s pretty much like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife.

ANYTHING THAT CAN go wrong does go wrong.

We’ve all experienced it.

It’s either life conspiring against us or plain old bad luck.

Either way, you can just guarantee that the most annoying thing will always happen. Woe is us.

1. The toast will fall jam-side down

Image: via QuickMeme

This is actually a recognised thing called “buttered toast phenomenon” - proving that even science is conspiring against us.

2.You cannot dress right for the weather

The day you don’t bring a coat, it will rain.

Image: via Flickriver

And the day you bring an umbrella, the sun will be splitting the stones.

3. Masses of people come in just as you close the cubicle door

This is the office toilet when you go in:

Image: via Shutterstock

This is the office toilet as soon as you’ve sat down in a cubicle:

Image: via Shutterstock

4. You will fall sick on your day off

Got some time off work? Maybe some holidays booked? Or even just a long weekend?

Image: via Good Health

BAM. Headcold.

5. It will rain just after you wash the car

Image: via Crave

The rage.

6. Paths of love will never run smoothly

The one special someone you fancy never texts back, yet that other person you don’t like is constantly blowing up your beeper.

Image: via Tumblr


7. Postman will come just as you step into the bath

A watched package never arrives.

Image: via Knock Knock Stuff

Nothing is more scream-inducing than the little slip of paper telling you the postman called.

8. No bus for 30mins, then 3 arrive at the same time

Excruciating stuff.

And you are never the lucky fecker who wanders up the bus stop just as the bus arrives.

9. Red lights all the way into town when you’re late

Ever needed to be somewhere extra quick?

Image: via Shutterstock

Well, prepare for the LONGEST JOURNEY OF YOUR LIFE.

10. Looking crap? You’ll bump into your ex

This is simply guaranteed. You won’t bump into your ex when you just got your hair done, or when you’re looking happy and amazing.

Image: via Soda Head

You’ll bump into them when hungover and unkempt, in tracksuit bottoms, with ratty hair and possibly even body odour.

11. Tea’s gone cold by the time you get to drink it

Your boss will always ask you to do something just as you’ve made a cup of tea.

The job will take just as long as it takes for that cup of tea to go cold.

12. Click on send, then immediately spot mistake

Image: via Which Conversation

“All the vest, John”.

13. You’ll lose stuff to that “safe place”

Putting something away for “safe-keeping”? Well you may as well store it in a black hole.

Image: via He-Man

You’re never seeing that thing again.

What unfortunate or enraging things in life do you bank on happening?

Read: The 8 impossible Facebook dilemmas>

Read: 12 people who had an incredibly close call>

Read: 8 ways your brain is ruining your life>

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