SO THIS WEEK is actually ridiculous when it comes to the sunshine.
We’ve already had a super sunny Bank Holiday and now it is Wednesday (WEDNESDAY) and the weather is still magnificent.
Our track record isn’t the best when it comes to summer weather but can you feel the general buzz from people is shifting.
People are saying things like “Sure, I’ll probably just take my sun holiday here this year” and “I’ve actually built up a great tan all the same” as if we are living in L.A. or something and weather this warm is totally standard.
Sadly, it isn’t and we reckon that if we had weather like this all the time we’d only go and ruin it for ourselves.
Honestly.
1. We would no longer be able to talk about the weather at length
via Shutterstock
If the weather was just nice all the time then we’d no have nothing weather related to talk about.
It’d be “well, it’s another nice day” and “Ah, a great drying out there. Again” and nothing else.
What would you use for small talk with taxi drivers / strangers at parties / your third cousin if you can’t moan about torrential rain, freezing temperatures or how it is the middle of June and you’re still wearing your winter coat?
2. Some people would just not be able for it
Like this chap:
3. Flip-flops would be everywhere
People would be forced to wear flip-flops all the time due to the heat.
Like befriending a stranger, reading a Jilly Cooper novel and un-ironically drinking Pina Coaldas, flip-flops should be confined to your sun holiday.
Otherwise it would mean having to gawk at the feet of people on the street constantly.
No amount of sun is worth that.
4. Ice cream shortage
The best thing about intense heat is getting to eat all the ice cream ever.
But if it stays warm all the time and we live on it that means the ice cream might run out.
No more ice cream?
This is our reaction:
5. The humble pub would suffer greatly
via Shutterstock
For every beer garden paradise you have there are a good 10 pubs that are dingy and small and not places you’d want to be in when the weather is good.
Sitting in a dimly lit room drinking ale and trying to make sense of what the old men beside you are talking about.
It’s who we are.
6. Farmer’s tan would be a thing of the past
We would no longer be able to spot an Irish person in a foreign country at hundred paces via their farmer tan.
Another key element of how define ourselves really.
7. We would watch far less TV
We’d be so busy running around the sun and having BBQs that we’d forget important things like catching up on the soaps and spending entire weekends racing through Breaking Bad boxsets.
Are we really ready to lose those kind of special moments?
8. People would just be in great form all the time
Sam Boal / Photocall Ireland
Oh you might think that the nice weather would lift our spirits and that is a good thing.
But what about our national skill for moaning and being general complaint champions?
Our radio talk shows will become places for people ring in and say things like “Oh sure it’s another sunny day and I’m topping up my tan. That’s it now, I’m finished. Goodbye”.
We’d never get to have a proper whinge about anything because we’d all be so tanned and relaxed.
Dreadful.
9. We would never get anything done.
Sam Boal / Photocall Ireland
Look it’s a nice novelty but the way we carry on in the sun we would all become far less interested in our jobs and just sit around in the sun all day.
The sun would bring the country to a standstill because we’d all being pulling sickies so we could drink cans in the park.
The place would be in tatters.
Tatters.
