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Chip off the old block

Chips: An important and definitive ranking

McDonald’s. Supermacs. Burger King. Who will come out on top?

WHAT MAKES A good chip is a debate as old as time – but we’re finally laying down the law.

Here is an important and official ranking of the best chips in Ireland. The ranking is final.

12. Oven chips

5505763234_bf1f876eb5_b Flickr / remysharp Flickr / remysharp / remysharp

They take far too long to become an acceptable shade of yellow, let alone get crispy. A poor imitation of the real thing.

11. KFC

We’ve been blinded by the glorious chicken for far too long. The fact is this: KFC chips suck. Barely edible, even with heaps of gravy.

10. Nando’s

12359319704_8ea0f0b239_k (1) Flickr / digitalarch Flickr / digitalarch / digitalarch

Thin, pale, generally unsatisfying. Just get the mash, for god’s sake.

9. Burger King

5443958762_6df0881977_b Flickr / Steven Depolo Flickr / Steven Depolo / Steven Depolo

BK isn’t even trying with these mottled things. Do they think we’re thick?

8. Chips from the Chinese

Just not good. But then again, they aren’t a Chinese restaurant’s number one priority.

Perfectly acceptable in a 3-in-1. Separately? Don’t bother.

7. Notiony chips

The gastropub chip - massive yokes with the potato skin still on, sprinkled with sea salt and served in a bucket.

Nice now and again, but like X Factor contestants, we prefer our chips to be down to earth.

6. Sweet potato fries

6252715238_fbf6bb8a34_b Flickr / calgaryreviews Flickr / calgaryreviews / calgaryreviews

Chips, but healthy! A-OK, in our book. That said, time is of the essence. Eat them while they’re piping hot or forget about it.

5. Eddie Rockets

Crispy delights, and the variety of toppings is a plus.

Someone needs to share the recipe for the seasoning on Eddie Rockets chips. You’d aaate it with a spoon, so you would.

4. Supermacs

14146456898_86862d39af_k Flickr / pburka Flickr / pburka / pburka

Look ma! Actual potato! Supermacs chips win points for the thick cut, but lose them for occasional sogginess. Bonus points for being the staple diet of Irish Rail users everywhere.

3. McDonald’s

A crispier, tastier and generally more healthy-looking (in colour, not in content) chip than that of its rivals.

15280550817_3b5c889a7a_k Flickr / danijeljames Flickr / danijeljames / danijeljames

Bad batches are a constant threat, but they can be saved by the right sauce. (It’s Sweet Curry, by the way.)

2. McDonald’s Twisty Fries

McDonald’s chips alone are good. McDonald’s chips twisted up and seasoned are magical.

1. Chipper chips

Proper chipper chips. How do we even begin to describe their beauty?

National Fish and Chips Day James Horan / Photocall Ireland James Horan / Photocall Ireland / Photocall Ireland

You’d be mad if you thought anything could beat them. Even the smell is enough to drive you wild, and the taste – heaven. HEAVEN.

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