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Dublin: 5 °C Tuesday 17 September, 2019
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Incredible couch ad promises to protect your family from 'floor lava'

THE FLOOR IS LAVA!

THE FLOOR IS LAVA!  Sure we all know that, so it’s a good thing that this Craigslist ad for a couch acknowledged it.

Rather than going on and on about boring stuff like comfort and style, this advertisers gets right down to the nitty gritty.

UfMYRkf Source: Imgur

For a larger version click here.

It reads:

Do you love your family?Do you want to protect them?

Then why have you not yet done anything about the fact that THE FLOOR IS LAVA.  YOU CAN’T TOUCH IT OR YOU’LL DIE.

For the low cost of $25 you can spare your family from this terrible fate. We are offering a floor-lava proof island to provide shelter and safety. It has been known to protect up to 4 people simultaneously but may hold even more in a dire emergency…

…As a FREE bonus we’ll throw in four soft, comfortable, throwable (and most importantly LAVAPROOF) stepping stones, allowing for the mobility to reach safe areas.  THese may provide YOUR ONLY CHANCE OF RESCUE…

Thank God someone has finally tackled this issue.

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