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Dublin: 10 °C Friday 19 April, 2024
Mad cows

This $110 cologne will make you attractive to cows

Guaranteed to make them moo-n over you.

cow Shutterstock Shutterstock

HAVING TROUBLE WITH your cattle?

Never fear. An American perfume company has created a new cologne especially for farmers…aimed at making them attractive to their cows.

Cows have extremely powerful noses that can pick up a scent from six miles off, but they shy away from chemical smells like washing powder.

“I set out to make something sexy and subtle, that cows would find soothing,” said perfumer Lisa Brodar to modernfarmer.com.

whiskey_cologne_large_6_large Portland General Store Portland General Store

The $110 fragrance is described as a “woody, earthen musk” that relaxes even the most skittish calf and eases the milking process.

But before you buy a bottle to give to your local cattle farmer, Brodar has this advice:

This probably isn’t for the third generation farmer that smells like whiskey…it’s for the guy in Brooklyn who wants to move back to the land, become a homesteader, but still likes to go out at night.

Ah. Sexy hipster farmers only, please.

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