THE FOOTBALL IS back. The Premier League kicked off today and it’s excellent news for everyone who likes and understands football. But those that don’t? It’s gonna be a long few months.
1. You’re already at the end of your tether looking at Fantasy Football codes
The office, social media, on television, your WhatsApp group, on a little note under your pillow… people are leaving codes everywhere, inviting you to join.
WHAT IS THIS?
2. Get this in your ears, you’ll be hearing a lot of it
3. Your OH will be tied up on Saturdays for the next nine months
Your football-enthusiast girlfriend or boyfriend will write off Saturdays to watch the football. It’s better off this way, don’t be in their company while they’ve got their nose in a phone checking results.
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4. Social media is also off bounds
What’s even the deal with most of these trending topics?
Australia is playing New Zealand? Oh wait that’s rugby? #COYS = Tottenham… now how does that work? Ooooh, Spurs. Well that makes sense.
5. When something actually happens, you’ve to give up altogether
6. It seems like there’s no end in sight
7. Forget trying to understand football fanatics having conversations around you
Um yeah, we agree.
8. And focus on picking up the pieces
Their team lost and now they’re in a fouler. Be gentle, this too shall pass.
