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Dublin: 14 °C Monday 20 May, 2019
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The 12 stages of 'going to bed early'

None of which include actually going to bed early.

The inception

wake Source: Shutterstock

The minute you wake up you think, ‘that’s it, I’m going to bed early tonight’.

The commitment

bed early Source: Shutterstock

You spend the day talking about the fact that you’re going to bed early.  Could be as early as 8pm. WHO KNOWS?

The resistance

wrecked Source: Shutterstock

People invite you to go to the cinema, or for an after work drink.  No, no, you say, I’m going to bed early tonight!

The outfit

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You go home, put your pyjamas on immediately, because you won’t be up for long.

The delay

home and awy

You watch some telly while you eat your dinner, thinking, I’ll go to bed after this.

The denial

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You watch another episode, telling yourself that if you go to bed straight after this one, it’s still an early night.

The process

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You brush your teeth and wash your face, make yourself a chamomile tea and change your sheets.  You want to have a really good night’s sleep, so it’s worth the extra effort.

The update

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You’ll just check your phone before you go to sleep, make sure that you haven’t missed anything important.

The realisation

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Crap!  It’s 11!  Is that still early?  Are you still having an early night?!? Probably not.

The denial

8 hours Source: Shutterstock

You turn your lamp off, lie down and calculate how many hours of sleep you’re going to get.  Still eight hours!  That’s ok!

The acceptance

dream over Source: Shutterstock

You lie there watching the minutes tick by and recalculating the amount of sleep you’re going to have until eventually, at around 6 hours you fall asleep.

So much for an early night.

The inception

wake

The minute you wake up you think, ‘that’s it, I’m going to bed early tonight’.

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