Dublin: 7 °C Tuesday 7 February, 2023
# Zzzzzz
The guide to staying awake in boring situations
Life is boring sometimes guys, that’s just a fact.

LIFE ISN’T ALL dancing and fire crackers, y’know.

Sometimes, it’s dull as dishwater.  Whether it’s at work, college or with family, occasionally we all find ourselves in boring situations.  Boring situations where we struggle to stay awake.

Fear not, dear friends. is here to help.

Here is our guide to staying awake in boring situations.

Chew ice

This is actual legitimate advice.  The action itself should keep you conscious and the coldness should keep you alert.

If you can’t access ice, try gum.  It should do the trick.

Test your memory

Challenge yourself to remember everyone who has ever won the X Factor, or captained your favourite side.

Not only will it keep your brain going, it’ll also serve as helpful trivia for the next table quiz you attend.

Imagine yourself doing something crazy

If you’re in a work meeting or at a family gathering, try to think of the most outlandish thing you could possible do and imagine how people would react.

What would happen if you threw that guy’s hot cup of tea in his face?  Or if you took that woman’s cigarettes out of her handbag and lit up right there and then?

If you think you could handle the reaction, do it!  Ha ha…we’re joking of course.  Do not do anything that will get you fired/kicked out of your family.

Bring in something smelly

Strong smells wake you up, as evidence by the presence of smelling salts in every fainting scene you watched growing up.

If you’re scared you’re going to fall asleep, bring something smelly with you that you can have the odd whiff of to keep you going.  Mint is recommended.

Try to do it discreetly, otherwise you could end up in an awkward meeting with HR.

Make a list

Try to make a list of everyone you’ve ever kissed.  Or everyone you’ve ever fancied.  Or everyone you ever lent something to.

A little stroll down memory lane is always fun, and the horror of some of your former snogging partners is bound to snap you out of any cozy slumber.

Tongue yourself

Apparently there are lots of nerves on the roof of your mouth, so if you press your tongue against it you’ll wake yourself up.

We’re doing it right now!

Stick your head out the window

Ok, sticking your head out the window may not actually be appropriate but fresh air does help.

What tricks do you use to keep yourself awake?  Tell us in the comments.

Have you seen this TD’s tweet about eggs?>

7 life-defining bits of advice from Arnold Schwarzenegger>

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