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Dublin: 9 °C Thursday 28 March, 2024
what if

16 things that would happen if rom coms took place in Ireland

Just imagine it.

1. Kissing in the rain would never happen because somebody would definitely have an umbrella/dart into the nearest Spar cursing about “THIS KIP OF A COUNTRY”

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Nobody is hanging around letting their jeans soak up the street juice. Nobody.

2. And the chances of catching a cold would be too great to even countenance an extended shift when it’s tipping it down

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“Let’s get in out of this rain, we’ll be soaked through.”

^every Irish person in the rain.

3. No matter how sexy skinny dipping is it would never happen because of the Baltic temperatures

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4. Some lad throwing stones against a girl’s window would be swiftly told to f**k off by her Da

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“This isn’t some movie.”

5. People would never meet in an extremely cute way. It would be in the pub through a mutual friend from college, and many pints would be consumed

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The 3am kebab and shift would make a fine climactic scene though.

6. Chasing after somebody through security would never happen because of the queues at Dublin Airport

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And, of course, the massive levels of illegality involved.

7. In fact, any glamorous last minute travel just wouldn’t be an option because Ryanair’s prices are prohibitive

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“I need to catch this last minute flight to Prague. I might still catch him!”

*opens skyscanner*

“Oh.”

It doesn’t matter how suave the character is, they just wouldn’t pay those prices.

8. Meeting someone on the internet would not be the most romantic thing ever. More likely, it would be an awkward pint followed by a few texts

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And FIN.

9. The kid from Sleepless in Seattle would be calling in to Liveline to find his Dad a wife, but he wouldn’t make it on the air because it’s not controversial enough

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10. The cute first date would not take place in a glamorous restaurant because nobody would risk spending the cash on a date that might be awkward as f**k

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You’d be forking out hundreds a month if that was the case.

Pints it is.

11. Mid ’00s era Matthew McConnaughy would be played by an actor from Love/Hate and he’d definitely be a charming farmer

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“I’m just an old school lad” – actor with movie star looks hanging out in a Spar.

12. The girl with glasses who is talked about as a “total nerd” would actually be considered a complete ride

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Because glasses do not equal “quirky” in Ireland.

13. The romantic Prom scene would take place at a Debs in a three star hotel

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One of the lads forgot his “good shoes” and is wearing black runners. It would slightly ruin the glamour of the scene.

14. The main character would have an idea to organise a flash mob to declare their feelings but their friends would talk them out of it because it’s mortifying

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They end up just sending a vague text about meeting up.

15. Secondary school scenes would not be a hotbed of captivating and charismatic flirting

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Shuffling past your potential shift “down the town” would be the height of flirting. Nobody is star of the basketball team either.

16. And finally… thecute misunderstanding that always happens over a ridiculously simple thing would be solved within two minutes down the pub

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“I thought that text meant something else!”

*two protagonists don’t talk for months on end*

More likely, the whole thing would be thrashed out in the pub and things would be back to normal in no time.

More 19 things that would happen if Sex and the City was set in Dublin>

More 19 things that would happen if Friends was set in Dublin>

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