IRISH FOOD IS greater than American food in many ways, and let us provide the evidence.
1. Sausage rolls > Corn dogs
Our beautiful sausage rolls taste far superior to crusty corn dogs. Corn dogs are like a hot dog dipped in batter, but sausage rolls are sausage meat enveloped in a delicious flaky pastry and certainly not served on a stick.
2. Biscuits > Cookies
Let’s be real, there’s not enough variety and too much sugar in American cookies. Give us a tin of, ironically, USA biscuits, any day.
3. Tayto > Lay’s
Enough said. The States think they own crisps, but alas, they are wrong.
4. Scones > biscuits
What we call scones, the States call biscuits. They eat them with jam, butter, and… gravy. Disturbing.
5. Irish gravy > their monstrous creation
If you are sensitive to upsetting images, please look elsewhere now. Gravy in the States is a lot less appetising than the delicious Knorr we all know and love.
6. Potato waffles > sweet waffles
Sweet waffles are all well and good, but they’re nowhere near as resilient or satisfying to have with dinner as potato waffles are.
7. Rashers > Bacon
Imagine not having access to a rasher sandwich of a Sunday morning. Imagine that? Imagine you had to put up with some grisly bacon instead? Shudders.
8. Our chocolate > Their chocolate
There’s way too much sugar in American chocolate and it kinda tastes like we imagine baby vomit might. Cadbury’s wins this round.
9. Chips > Fries
Give us a manky big bag of chipper chips in a brown bag over flimsy little fries, ANY DAY.
10. Our salads are superior
American salads are JUST A BOWL OF LEAVES. Where are the slices of ham, what of the boiled egg? The salad cream? The cheese singles?
