This site uses cookies to improve your experience and to provide services and advertising. By continuing to browse, you agree to the use of cookies described in our Cookies Policy. You may change your settings at any time but this may impact on the functionality of the site. To learn more see our Cookies Policy.
Dublin: 15 °C Monday 13 July, 2020

10 mortifying elements of the Irish night out

How far will you get tonight?

1. Coming to believe that you’re God’s gift to the dancefloor

2. Repeatedly telling people you love them

As if they don’t believe you. “No, REALLY. You’re SO GREAT.”

3. Spilling drinks all down yourself/someone else

Lucky you didn’t need that shirt anyway.

Flickr/Andrew St. Clair

4. Attempting to walk down nightclub steps in a graceful, gazelle-like fashion

5. Trying to light a cigarette at the wrong end


6. Making a very serious point about something, but halfway through realise you’ve forgotten why you started talking

7. Trying it on with someone in the wholehearted belief that you are being extremely smooth


8. Filling the sent folder of shame


9. Performing the Irish goodbye

Legging it without telling anyone so you won’t be forced to have another drink.


10. Falling asleep somewhere very uncomfortable


Hello, sleep. Hello, joint pain.

Have a great night!

You know you’re in a bona-fide Irish nightclub when…>

13 songs every Irish person MUST know the words to>

  • Share on Facebook
  • Email this article

About the author:

Michael Freeman

Read next: