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20 things that always happened at Mass

If you were dragged to Mass on a weekly basis these things will sound familiar.

FOR MANY IRISH people, going to Mass on Sundays was a part of growing up.

Whether you liked it or not, you got your arse out of bed and dragged it to your local church each and every week (until you either got into it, or out of it).

Thus, there are certain experiences that all mass goers remember.  Here are 20 things that happened at Mass.

Peace be with you fakeouts

blolt

Oh, you want a hand shake? Too slow! (Siblings only or you’d be in big trouble.)

Peace be with you discomfort

tumblr_lx725lDtIW1qd6r6bo1_500

Why do you have to shake hands with that strange man from down the road?  You don’t want to!

Sulking

L7sq3

Because you didn’t want to be there, because your older sister didn’t have to go, because you weren’t allowed to bring your new Barbie…

Sneaky exits

But+I+sure+can+See+ya+_b21743c5388b0abf0d595cbfa5f9505e

Teenagers always seeming to sidle off straight after communion leaving you seething with jealousy.

Bribery

bribe Source: Flickr/Dahon

Getting the Sunday papers and/or an ice cream on the way home

Someone standing when they weren’t meant to

whoops

Hopefully not you this week.

Scolding

messing

For any number of things.  Being loud, messing with the holy water, forgetting to genuflect.

Someone squirming

pee-3

Nothing worse than getting a runny nose during mass or needing to go the bathroom and realising you were essentially stuck for an hour.

Looks of delight/despair upon entering the church

NPH-dissapoint

Depending on who the priest is you might get out quickly… or be there for an eternity.

Mortification

shame

If you were unlucky enough to be the last person to get passed the money basket and had to walk it up to the front of the church you were definitely morto.

Hormones

bashful

Young men and women scoping out the people they fancied from across the church.  IF THE PRIEST ONLY KNEW!

The giggles

giphy

Someone always gets the giggles.  And they’re always contagious.

Farting

Miami-Heat-Bench-Fart

Someone always farts. Always.

Smugness

smug

Oh, you don’t know all the words to this hymn?  Well I do!

Coughing

Incensed Up Source: gashwin

You would think that priests would have mastered the incense but from time to time it’s a little out of control.

Children running up to the altar

boy-4-2

There’s always one.  The parents are always mortified.

Good singing

christina-aguilera-bleeding-at-etta-james-funeral

Always really loudly, always showing off.

Bad singing

Source: Hannah Sergeant

Always really loudly, always out of key.

Miming the words

britney-singing

Always by the people who wished they could just disappear.

Commentary

Source: sceilig

There were always auld lads standing down the back of the church (despite there being room to sit) making remarks about the people sitting down.

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