Dublin: -2 °C Friday 1 December, 2023
too cool for school

This accurately describes every 'trendy' restaurant in Ireland

Everything’s covered, from the mismatched armchairs to the exposed electrics.

OVER THE PAST few years we’ve seen a proliferation of new, trendy restaurants and bars around the country. Which is obviously a great thing.

But there’s only so many times adult humans can sit in mismatched armchairs and sup from jam jars without thinking “Hey, haven’t we seen all this before?”

That’s because you probably have, according to this guide to setting up a Trendy Restaurant by Twitter user @snorewell.

Most hard-hitting points:

Expose all of the electrics and plumbing. Patrons want to be able to see all of the light fittings. Decorative ceiling? Pull that shit down immediately.
Each and every chalkboard in your establishment absolutely must display an inspirational quote, movie quote, or fact of the day. Patrons love to Instagram these.
Finally, location. Very important. Open your trendy restaurant in a really shitty part of town. But state that it’s ‘up and coming’ and say something about gentrification.

Nail, head, etc.

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