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Dublin: 10 °C Tuesday 19 March, 2024
giz chips

17 sure-fire ways to woo an Irish person

Romantic Ireland is NOT dead and gone.

1. Get their tea right on the first go

2. And have the kettle already boiling for them when they come over. Swoon

3. Chips. Anytime, any place

4. Ignore them juuuuust a little bit when you’re at the pub with your respective mates

5. Then text them the next morning to say ‘Good nite last nite?’ 

6. Offer the last chip/biscuit/crisp. They’ll be so surprised they’ll fall in love then and there

7. Volunteer to go to the shop on a hungover morning to get them a roll and a tin of something fizzy

8. Tag them in funny dog videos on Facebook, saying ‘lol it’s you’. Just to let them know you’re thinking of them

9. Tell them they got a ‘great colour’ on their holidays, even if they didn’t

10. Impress them with stories about Irish celebrities, like how your dad was once a roadie for Thin Lizzy (well, he moved a few boxes at one gig, but sure who cares)

11. Be nice to your mam, in general

12. Give them a hoodie with they’re freeeeeezing and never ask for it back

14. Take them for spins in your car. Bonus points if you go and pick them up from somewhere to save them having to walk in the rain

15. Make their friends laugh

16. Get out of bed to check the door’s locked/investigate the noise that’s worrying them downstairs

17. And slag the living daylights out of them. They’ll be putty in your hands

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