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What your favourite celebrities would be like as Facebook friends

What would Beyoncé post? What about George Hook?

OVER ON TWITTER you can follow all kinds of famous people and if you’re really lucky some of them might even acknowledge you.

Twitter is great for stalking celebrities but we all know that Facebook is way more invasive (i.e. interesting) and compelling way to follow somebody’s every move.

So, what if you were mates with big name celebrities on Facebook?

What would it be like? We got our thinking cap to imagine the best (and worst).

1. Justin Bieber

His tweets are plenty annoying but on Facebook we reckon he’d be even worse.

He’s like the cheeky nephew you are friends with but really want to delete who’d post statuses about amazing modified cars and banging out the tunes with the lads when he’s probably just at home watching the Late Late with his granny.

And if he’s posting pictures like this on Instagram, God knows how much worse his Facebook pictures would be

Justin Bieber / Instagram

Also we really feel like he’d Write All His Statuses Like This Or Else Never Use Punctuation And They’d Be Really Hard To Read.

2. Taylor Swift

Lionel Cironneau/AP/Press Association Images

With all the speculation about Taylor’s love life and her high profile string of exes we reckon her Facebook page would be gold.

She’d change her relationship status every two weeks and her most frequent one would be It’s Complicated.

Surely during the heights of the Harry Styles affair she’d post mysterious statuses  ”Having some fun with a certain English gent” and we bet the minute something went wrong it would just be ” :(” or “GUYS R THE WORST!11!!!”.

If you’re going to be Facebook friends with an overly dramatic serial dater it might as well be Taylor Swift.

3. Beyoncé

Frank Micelotta/AP/Press Association Images

Much is made of how controlled Miss Knowles is with her public image so imagine if Beyoncé was up on Facebook posting lots and lots of intimate details of her life?

In true Bey style we’re sure it’d all be very controlled and she’d be the the picture perfect Facebook poster.

In fact, she’d be the person whose posts of her new baby, her adoring husband and “beautiful fans” would be so free of flaw that you and your friends would be convinced she was lying and start to imagine all the problems she’s secretly having.

God, Facebook is a bit scary.

4. Rihanna

Andy Kropa/AP/Press Association Images

Rihanna is that girl on Facebook you befriended at a particularly debauched house party that you don’t know that well but whose social media antics regularly leave your jaw on the floor.

There’s the statuses about whatever illegal drug she’s happily enjoying, her increasingly raunchy pics and watching in amazement at what “I met you at a house party” randomers she befriends next.

She’d also occasionally post on your wall and ask when you guys were going to party again and in a way you’d feel really cool but secretly you’re terrified because you could never keep up with her.

5. George Hook

Sasko Lazarov/Photocall Ireland

He’s outspoken and a respected broadcaster but we reckon George’s real gift to us all would be as our Facebook friend.

We picture George being like that rowdy uncle you get untold joy from being Facebook friends with as he leaves THE CAPS LOCK BUTTON ON or mixes up the message box with the status button.


6.  Anne Doyle

RTE / YouTube

You always hear about how Anne Doyle has a really great sense of humour in real life and is apparently gas craic altogether so imagine if she was on your Facebook feed?

We bet she’d post really filthy jokes on your status and pictures of her in very impressive Helen Mirren style ensembles that would be raking in the likes.

Also there’d be the thrill of her possibly spilling secrets from her years in the RTE newsroom. Lovely.

7. Steven Seagal

We just feel like he’d post all kinds of strange but inspiring statuses and pictures of himself doing unusual things.

And you could post on his wall asking for acting advice, having viewed this:

OhItsChampyBoy / Tumblr

8. Amy Huberman

Benkey/AFF/EMPICS Entertainment

We kinda want to be best mates with Amy Huberman and if we can’t have that then we just want the ability to like her statuses, regularly scroll through pictures of her with BOD and the baby and secretly wish we had her life.

It’s what Facebook was invented for.

9.  Bono

Michael Sohn/AP/Press Association Images

Bono’s Facebook posts would be an eclectic but engaging mix of cringe inducing statements about world poverty, selfies of him in his latest pair of dodgy sunglasses and tagging himself at The Clarence with various famous people.

We also feel there’d be a giddy thrill to having him occasionally interact with you, like say the odd “lol” under whatever funny cat video you’ve shared that afternoon.

10.  Zooey Deschanel

Tammie Arroyo/AFF/EMPICS Entertainment

She’d be the “quirky” Facebook friend who’d regularly post how over Facebook she was before uploading an album of 56 different pictures of her at a fixie bike fair.

You’d vow to unfriend her and then she’d post something genuinely funny and so you figure the odd burst of kooky, hipster overload would be worth it.

11. Ryan Gosling

PBG/PBG/Empics Entertainment

What if he posted those Hey Girl Ryan memes to his page?

What if he said things like “Hey, does anyone want a loan of the Drive jacket this week? I don’t need it”.


Also you know he’d comment on Zooey Deschanel’s quirky overload Facebook posts saying things like “Hey girl, why don’t you stop trying so hard and let me do the hipster heavy lifting for both of us”. Or similar.

Wolfe Tone, Michael Collins and Bobby Sands… RAPPING>

What’s on Nidge from Love/Hate’s iPod?>

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