THERE WAS SOMETHING different from the get go when The Late Late Show kicked off last night.
Firstly, all of the males members of the studio were all standing in a line and clapping.
Secondly, all of the ladies were sitting down, giggling.
Thirdly… well, we didn’t really need a thirdly. We were – quite frankly – worried. Something was up.
Ryan T confirmed our wobbles, stating that they were all single, and that by the end of the show some of them might have found themselves a date.
Bríd from Cavan was first up. She was told to pick three lads she liked the look of, to present them with a heart, and then go off and have a speed date with them.
Bríd was charming, and the lads were lovely so while there was a cushion hovering in the vicinity of viewers’ faces, there was no need to dive behind it.
Class
Next came a chat with the two charming young lads from Moone Boy. Fine family fun.
And then a frank and honest interview with former Cork hurler Conor Cusack, who spoke about the reaction to coming out publicly last month.
But then, after a musical interlude, something happened. Something that made the country’s knees go a bit funny…
Cringe
That’s right dear readers, it took a turn for the Take Me Out.
Class
After the Take Me Out trauma, everyone’s favourite Irish mammy Brenda Fricker came on to make everything okay again.
But then, something happened that NONE of us were prepared for….
SEX ON THE LATE LATE!
Cringe
New York Vogue columist and ‘Slutever’ blogger Karley Sciortino was welcomed to the stage by (at this stage) slightly frazzled Ryan T.
Listen, these are just some of the words she dropped:
“Swingers”
“Virginity” (and the loss of said virginity)
“Pussy Whipping”
“Vajacial”
Cue frantic reaching for the RTÉ Guide/racing for the bathroom/’accidental’ sitting on the remote control.
Bear in mind that the entire audience was made up of men and women, IRISH men and women, who didn’t know each other .
The awkward giggling was out of control.
We think it’s fair to say that everyone was only delighted to eventually get back to the speed dating.
Phew.
