LADS, IF THERE’S one thing we can be grateful for, it’t the fact that St. Patrick hooshed all the snakes out of Ireland. We would not be able for the kind of carry on we’re hearing about from Florida today.
Normal punter Jason Leon was minding his own business, just innocently ‘driving around late at night’ in Southeast Miami when he spotted a snake.
It appeared to be a few feet long, and being the big man that he is, Jason decided to do a job on him. He got out of the car, grabbed the snake behind it’s head and dragged it out of the bush.
We know what you’re thinking. WAS HE BLEEDIN’ MENTAL? We also had that thought.
As it turned out, the snake was much, much bigger than he thought, and it began to wrap itself around Jason’s lef. He called for help from his mates, and managed to kill the snake with a knife. According to the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission, it was lucky that ‘Jason once owned Burmese pythons as pets and had experience handling this nonvenomous constrictor species’. Eh, ya think?!?
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Once measured, it was discovered that at 18’8″, the snake was the largest Burmese python ever captured in the wild in Florida.
Can you imagine trying to sleep knowing these bad boys are slithering around outside? We’ll stick to rainy Ireland for a while anyway. Let Florida have their pythons!
