Dublin: 12 °C Wednesday 4 October, 2023
# queen of jolen
11 things all hairy girls know to be true
Frida Kahlo brow ON FLEEK.

MODERN BEAUTY standards dictate that a woman must be completely hairless (apart from the hair on her head, obvs) if she is to be considered attractive.

But what if your hair doesn’t exactly want to play ball? And what if you don’t want to, either? Here are 11 things all girls with thick, dark body hair know to be true.

You were teased for your eyebrows as a kid

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Little did the other kids know that years later they’d be running to have their HD brows done to keep up with the big brow trend. *cackles*

Jolen is your must-have beauty product

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And you’ve been caught sporting a Jolen ronnie more than a few times. Oops.

Your arms are hairier than some of your male friends’ arms

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Whatever, you’re cute.

And your moustache is much grander than theirs, too

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Still cute.

You have at least one witchy chin hair that you need to pluck monthly

You’ve named her Bridie. She’s pretty sassy.

Knuckle hair? Toe hair? They’re all there!

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There’s a bit of Hobbit in your ancestry. There has to be.

Your underarms have a permanent five o’clock shadow

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“Thou shalt shave in the morning, but after 5pm, thine arms must ne’er be lifted past thinehead” – ancient proverb

Your bikini line is more like bikini shorts

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Autumn and winter are the most wonderful times of the year

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You’ve tried every hair-removal trick in the book

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Bleaching. Laser surgery. Veet. Shaving. Reiki. Everything.

Nothing can hold back the tide.

But at the end of the day, you’re cool with it all

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Sure, you have thick, dark hair all over your body, but most importantly, it’s thick and full on your head, too. Eat it, hair-haters.

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