AH, THE IRISH breakfast.
It’s an institution, a hangover cure and an exercise in gluttony.
A traditional Irish breakfast consists of some variation of the following ingredients: sausages, rashers, white pudding, black pudding, tomato, beans, mushrooms, potato farls, hash browns and toast.
But as we know all too well, not all ingredients were created equal.
Some are delicious, some are lacklustre, some are lifesaving and some are just a complete waste of space.
Here, in descending order, we present a ranking of the best Irish breakfast ingredients.
8. Mushrooms
Mushrooms are only there to give the appearance of this being a balanced meal and frankly, they add little to the meal.
“You know what would really sort this hangover? Mushrooms.”
- Nobody ever
7. Beans
Beans are ranked at number eight, simply because they are such a contentious component of the Irish breakfast. For every person that loves them, there’s a person that can’t abide them.
Also, the bean juice encroaches on every other part of the meal and is generally a hazard.
6. White pudding
We’re not saying that white pudding is bad, but think about it: if you got up to make a fry and found that you didn’t have white pudding in the fridge, you could probably live without it.
5. Tomato
Unlike the mushroom, the tomato helps maintain the pretense that this is a balanced meal and it’s aesthetically pleasing.
Top marks.
4. Black pudding
There’s a reason why emigrants pine for the black stuff when they leave our shores and that’s because its deliciousness is unparalleled.
We’re just going to say it: Irish breakfast without black pudding is blasphemous.
You heard it here first.
3. Eggs
The humble egg is the glue that holds the whole thing together.
Sure, it might not be the fanciest part of the meal, but without it, you’d just have a plate of meat masquerading as a breakfast.
2. Rashers
Beautiful, succulent rashers.
The smell of rashers alone says, “Hey, you’re not working today!” and the sound of them sizzling in the pan is enough to make you drool.
Rashers, you are second best.
1. Sausages
It’s simple: a fry without a sausage is not a fry and anyone who claims otherwise is a liar.
Imagine you went to a restaurant and your fry came with no sausages.
Would you sit there and say, “Sure, that makes sense” or would you vow never to step foot in there again and tell everyone you knew about the time someone had the GALL to serve you a fry with no sausages?
Exactly. Case closed.
Disagree? Think we were unfair to beans? Love rashers more than sausages? Have it out in the comments!
