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Dublin: 9 °C Friday 19 April, 2024
pursuit of possibilities

The Blagger’s Guide to a Night Out

Want to fluke yourself into an access all areas night out? Read this first.

THE BEST NIGHTS out are the ones that aren’t planned.

It’s typical. You could plan your a party down to the very last detail – yet it’s the one night you don’t plan to go out that ends up being the best.

We’re all a bit cheeky in the pursuit of possibilities, and you have to be if you want to blag your way into a great night out. Not on the list? Not getting into the VIP area? Never fear, we’re here to help in advance of the weekend.

Step 1: Got no plans? Sounds like a plan

Go in with no expectations. In order to get the most from your chancer’s night out, you have to have a completely open mind and go where the night takes you. Never be afraid to keep trying.

Source: Doblelol

Step 2: Your name’s not down, you’re not coming in

Need to get your name on the guest list? It’s time to style this out. Pick a common name, walk up confidently, and never break eye contact.

Express utter confusion if they refuse you. Eventually you’ll become so annoying that the bouncers will just let you in. And remember Step 1, the art of skilled perseverance. Never give up on a good time.

Step 3: Access all areas

Need to get backstage? Wheedling isn’t going to cut it here. You’re going to have to make friends in high places. Do the roadies a favour and you’re GOLDEN.

Step 4: The velvet rope

Want to get into the VIP area? Don’t queue. Would a true VIP queue? No – so neither should you. An incredibly rude attitude is the correct approach here. That way, they won’t be able to tell you apart from the other legions of “very important” people…

Source: Imgur

Step 5: How to join the party

You’ve just chanced your arm into the VIP area, and now it’s time to make some pals. And that means being the life and soul.

Who’s going to argue that the funnest person in the place shouldn’t join the gang? No one, that’s who.

Source: GIFsoup

Step 6: And now that you’re in all the right places…

It’s time to schmooze. Make sure you’re wearing your gladrags and have a charismatic one-liner up your immaculate sleeve. You’ve blagged your way in – now make sure you don’t get chucked out.

Source: Expert Enough