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Dublin: 7 °C Tuesday 7 February, 2023

# Weird news

All time
# one erection
Here's why you shouldn't take 35 Viagra pills at once, in case you were wondering
This guy did, and well… It wasn’t good.
# robot wars
Five firefighters had to rescue a little girl who got her foot stuck in a toy robot
They had to saw the toy in half to get her out. Devo.
# stay out
This man was forced to call 911 after a 4-hour standoff with an angry cat
Giving cats a bad rap, this one is.
# mind the gap
Police had to rescue a naked man who got himself stuck on a raised bridge
In Florida. Where else?
# pigging out
A wild boar fell through the ceiling of a shop in Hong Kong and ran riot
Standard.
# i will in me hoop
A rake of police had to rescue a man who got stuck in a basketball net
Darwin Award Recipient, 2015.
# i ain't runnin
An old man punched a bear in the face to save his tiny dog, is a legend
Balls of steel.
# no chill
Wanted man said he planned to 'chill for the weekend', then turn himself in later
Oh, no pressure at all! Whenever you’re ready.
# slush puppie
A 4-year-old girl sneaked out of her house at 3am to get a 'slushie'
The little rascal.
# snap out of it
A wanted man revealed his hiding spot on Snapchat and immediately got caught
You FOOL! *shakes fist*
# CHEESED OFF
Boy awakes from a coma addicted to cheese and swearing
GIMME SOME F***ING CHEESE.
# mystery pooper
US police are searching for a man who randomly poos on parked cars
Oh dear.
# under the sea
Experts identify 'mysterious creature' discovered in woman's can of tuna
And very sadly, it’s not a tongue-eating parasite.
# jump around
Woman asked to leave US McDonald's for having a baby kangaroo in a car seat
Oh y’know, just a baby kangaroo in a car seat. As you do.
# d**k move
Teenager plays with gun, gets shot in worst place imaginable
Ouch.
# surprise surprise
'Dead' man shocks family by coming back to life at funeral, crying
You’d cry too if your family were about to bury you alive.
# eclipse
Dog takes the bus to meet her owner at the park, all by herself
Public transport has gone to the dogs.
# no phone zone
Man arrested at Chinese border with 94 iPhones strapped to his body
But his plan was foolproof! Foolproof, we tell you!
# work it out
Indian government worker sacked after pulling a 24-year-long sickie
The civil servant took leave from work in 1990 and never came back.
# cheating sucks
Woman catches out her cheating boyfriend with the help of Henry the Hoover
That’s why his nozzle is so big. It’s full of SECRETS.
# Smuggled
You'll never guess how this woman managed to sneak a gun into prison
Just think of the worst possible place to put a gun, and you have it.
# bullet impact tester
Paintballing company receives 10,000 applications for 'human paintball tester' job
Yes, there are thousands of people out there who would like to get shot at for a living.
# fishy behaviour
Man pays £300 to save his constipated goldfish
Constipated. Goldfish.
# NOOOOOPE
Teen wakes up during brain surgery, asks doctors 'How's it going?'
SCREEEEEAAAM.
# trapped in the closet
Florida couple 'trapped' in unlocked closet for two days
An R Kelly song come to life.
# evil stick
Mother buys 'princess' wand for daughter, discovers image of 'demon' inside
ARRGHH!
# Facepalm
Man accidentally texts his probation officer looking for some weed
Yep, he’s going back to jail.
# mad world
6 unexpected things that happened this week
A politician into bondage, an over-eager suitor and a sock-eating dog – it’s all the week’d weirdest news.
# mad world
6 unexpected things that happened this week
IVF penguins, foam hotdogs and a human skull – it’s all the week’d weirdest news.
# mad world
6 unexpected things that happened this week
Chicken, computer coders and stripping – it’s all the week’d weirdest news.
# star-crossed
Woman steals bottle of wine to see her jailed boyfriend
Love conquers all. Except jail time.
# mad world
6 unexpected things that happened this week
Cats with many lives and priests with recording contracts – it’s all the week’d weirdest news.
# mad world
6 unexpected things that happened this week
Cow farts, ghosts getting hefty fines and hash brownies – it’s the week’s weirdest news.
# mad world
6 unexpected things that happened this week
– it’s the week’s weirdest news.
# do a runner
UK police hunt 'Cinderella' thief who left shoe at crime scene
Shoe must be joking us.
# doll eyes
US police investigate creepy dolls modelled after young girls left outside family homes
Shiver.
# mad world
6 unexpected things that happened this week
Eyeballs, sleepwalking and botty coughs – it’s the week’s weirdest news.
# mad world
6 unexpected things that happened this week
Waitresses with guns, monster members and headbangers – it’s the week’s weirdest news.
# mad world
6 unexpected things that happened this week
Green puppies, stolen walls and shooting at the moon… it’s all the bizarre stories you need to know about.
# mad world
6 unexpected things that happened this week
Selfie surgery, sex dolls and gorillas on the loose – it’s the week’s wildest and wackiest news, rounded up just for you.